tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post6459817882573167323..comments2024-03-05T11:36:50.299-05:00Comments on Stand and Deliver: Sour grapes?Rixahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07908864785513937876noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-64728341097476425762010-02-18T13:28:28.855-05:002010-02-18T13:28:28.855-05:00Reading this, I instantly thought of one of Tom Br...Reading this, I instantly thought of one of Tom Brady's peers, quarterback Ben Rothlisburger. He took a bad hit late in the last game of the season, injuring his shoulder so badly his arm hung useless at his side for the rest of the game.<br /><br />Except, of course, during a play. Where he executed pass after laser guided pass, helping the Steelers win the final, close game of the season. Even though it was likely just for bragging rights, as the Steelers were unlikely to make the playoffs.<br /><br />Rothlisburger was trumpeted far and wide the next day. People marveled at his ability, his work ethic, the amazing way he lived in the moment and focused on the task at hand. How his team rallied round, rising to the challenge with his lead.<br /><br />Now compare that to the reaction to Tom Brady's wife doing something similar, at least physically. She lived in the moment, transformed what many believe is something incredibly painful into a positive force. Met her goals. Led her 'team' to the 'victory' they sought. And she is almost universally vilified for it.<br /><br />Hate is such a strange little beast...Amyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06554966320673218523noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-42119484743483222392010-02-06T09:55:47.577-05:002010-02-06T09:55:47.577-05:00I am so behind on reading blogs, but wanted to say...I am so behind on reading blogs, but wanted to say thanks for chiming in on this topic! I so agree. Why get mad at her for having a comfortable birth?<br /><br />I am a person that had a comfortable, unmedicated birth and sometimes people respond fairly strongly towards my birth story. Why is it that comfortable birth is SO hard to accept? <br /><br />I love what one Hypnobabies Mom said, <br />"I did have some discomfort during some parts of my birth, but it wasn't painFUL."Enjoy Birthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13227246774801636777noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-90760996262509582182010-02-04T11:38:11.683-05:002010-02-04T11:38:11.683-05:00Rixa, a well written commentary. Thanks.Rixa, a well written commentary. Thanks.Chouhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11711969146276630261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-13334356526634482262010-02-03T10:12:12.855-05:002010-02-03T10:12:12.855-05:00cheltz--see my comments in the other article about...cheltz--see my comments in the other article about that very thing! I probably came across stronger than I intended in the post about postpartum bodies. I don't doubt that you can regain your pre-baby body back--I did both times (at least in terms of weight) by around 4-6 months each time--but the way the magazine article presented it really rubbed me the wrong way. Gushing on about how all these celebs love to eat, how they just do a little cardio or a little Pilates and poof! back to normal. With the implication that for all the other "normal" women out there, that's all you need to do. I think it belies the effort that is much more common, for most women, to regain their pre-baby body. And of course I don't know if we ever totally go back: we have stretch marks, our breasts change size and shape, our bellies might always look a bit different. That's not a bad thing, either.Rixahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07908864785513937876noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-81348152908108299992010-02-02T23:29:46.596-05:002010-02-02T23:29:46.596-05:00I agree with the previous poster. I assumed (you ...I agree with the previous poster. I assumed (you know what they say about assuming) that since she is a Brazilian supermodel and the c-section rate is so high in Brazil that she had a c-section once I saw that she had given birth. I'm thrilled to see that she really went for what was going to work best for her instead of doing what is culturally expected. Bravo! I'm also happy for her that she had such a tremendous birth experience.Augustanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-49141156069124538442010-02-02T23:03:18.572-05:002010-02-02T23:03:18.572-05:00So it's ok to be sour grapes about Giselle hav...So it's ok to be sour grapes about Giselle having her pre-baby body back so soon, but not about her having a pain-free homebirth? <br /><br />I know plenty of women who've gotten their pre-baby body back almost immediately (especially after their first). I think it's equally unfair to flame her for that and assume it can't be done or hurts other women to believe so.<br /><br />Sorry to be a jerk. Normally I enjoy your blog. Thanks!cheltznoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-73349878809329515722010-02-02T19:20:03.054-05:002010-02-02T19:20:03.054-05:00Jealousy is an ugly thing, isn't it Labor Nurs...Jealousy is an ugly thing, isn't it Labor Nurse? ;)Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17475112158639748154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-82975071733341226162010-02-02T17:29:33.845-05:002010-02-02T17:29:33.845-05:00you aren't kidding call this sour grapes... my...you aren't kidding call this sour grapes... my gut tells me that people are threatened by her empowered birth experience, at (gasp) home, and ( double gasp) with a midwife! This all on top of the fact she is a beautiful, powerful, rich, independent woman who happens to also be married to a handsome, talented man.<br /><br />Sour grapes indeed.<br /><br />I hope her Brazilian & American followers take listen to her message that the sensations of labor need not be thought of as the most horrible "pain" a woman could experience, but a normal process bringing one closer to meeting their newborn.<br /><br />Great post, as always, Rixa.Labor Nurse, CNMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15238921141380296441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-7122315340198385362010-02-02T16:48:58.505-05:002010-02-02T16:48:58.505-05:00Shameful.
How dare those people attack Gisele for...Shameful.<br /><br />How dare those people attack Gisele for simply having a peaceful, gentle birth. Makes me sick.Shellyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02860907200379863018noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-86784055311005131012010-02-02T16:37:18.513-05:002010-02-02T16:37:18.513-05:00All very well-said, Rixa. I'm so glad you pass...All very well-said, Rixa. I'm so glad you passed on these stories.<br /><br />For the mean commenters, the ol' gangsta phrase comes to mind, "Hate the game, not the playa!" :)Rachel @ Lautaret Bohemiethttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00386970771824268791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-43235689329322208232010-02-02T16:12:26.295-05:002010-02-02T16:12:26.295-05:00Y'know, I wouldn't call my HBAC painless, ...Y'know, I wouldn't call my HBAC painless, but I would say that my putzy labor for the first 36 hours actually allowed me to welcome the contractions, even when they were painful. Maybe Giselle was able to go with the flow and let go a little more than me, but I can definitely see how it's possible to not be in pain. While some contractions I did experience as painful, it was no different than the pain of day 2 of the MS-150 or some other extreme athletic event. I am certainly glad she's sharing with the world, and sorry she's dealing w/the haters.<br /><br />It's funny, some of my friends (even from church) immediately had a different attitude toward me right after my HBAC, and I never quite fit in again (and no, not because I really talked it up...I pretty much only answered the questions they asked, as I knew where they stood). It's really sad how ingrained that attitude is, that you're a freak if you choose this. What's sad about it is, that the people who think that way, will never get to experience the beauty and will always live with the self-dobut that makes them act the way they do. Like I said, I didn't experience painless birth, but I'm not going to discount Giselle's experience... hers is hers and mine is mine. She's obviously high on her experience and I'm happy for her!<br /><br />Well, preaching to the proverbial choir, no?Anne Bennetthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03628287400786494907noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-86870487400999648212010-02-02T11:07:16.393-05:002010-02-02T11:07:16.393-05:00I also consider Gisele's experience ironic and...I also consider Gisele's experience ironic and completely wonderful considering how many women from her native Brazil have c-sections. They have one of the highest rates in the world, from what I've read. Good for her for not buying into all the crap.The Deranged Housewifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18038751876704709628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-18691309198776800182010-02-02T11:04:00.246-05:002010-02-02T11:04:00.246-05:00I knew it was only a matter of time before the &qu...I knew it was only a matter of time before the "haters" and the critics weighed in. People simply cannot wrap their heads around how women can willingly give birth without pain meds, because it's "supposed" to be painful. I tested positive for GBS with my second and had to have antibiotics during labor - THAT bothered me more than the contractions, and honestly, I think it was like having a TENS machine - it distracted me from the "real pain" of labor because it was such a PITA having that IV. <br /><br />Honestly, I think some women wallow in their immature, uninformed ignorance and expect other women to as well, and project that negativity to everyone they meet who is pregnant. Thus, the cycle continues ... *scream*The Deranged Housewifehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18038751876704709628noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-50092703712309443922010-02-02T10:11:53.226-05:002010-02-02T10:11:53.226-05:00Love this. I'm not even going to venture into ...Love this. I'm not even going to venture into the "stupid" comments, but it makes me sad that such a beautiful thing can polarize women and pit them against each other. So sad.Lanihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07513306977618928729noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-48444510047052533742010-02-02T09:52:25.377-05:002010-02-02T09:52:25.377-05:00Poor, Giselle. She opens up about a very intimate ...Poor, Giselle. She opens up about a very intimate experence and gets flamed for it because it's the "wrong" way to feel.<br /><br />The tendency for people to project their own feelings onto everyone around them has been on my mind lately. I don't know if it's more common now, or I'm just noticing it, but I see it all the time when people are being interviewed. Lots of "you" language, i.e. "You feel, you think, you go through..." instead of "I feel, I think".<br /><br />Giselle did not say anything about how other women (you) should have the same experience as she did. She clearly said "I managed..." People need to not personally. If it's not about you don't make it about you.Oliviahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01828516083662339236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-62306973147311649642010-02-02T08:58:47.297-05:002010-02-02T08:58:47.297-05:00Gisele's comment that, "I transformed tha...Gisele's comment that, "I transformed that intense feeling into a hope of seeing him" is exactly how I felt with my last birth. When I had a twinge of the bearing down feeling before some more opening contractions started again I was giggling with excitement because I knew I'd be meeting my baby soon. My contractions were painful, but nothing I couldn't handle, and I was so positive about each one bringing baby closer to me that it was easy to stay positive and motivated during the whole labour (and it did lessen the pain to surrender!). It is like a marathon runner dealing with the pain and exhaustion of all the exertion of her sport because she is focused on the finish line. Fabulous that Gisele had such a great birth!Bnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-76357544293759183112010-02-02T05:55:25.916-05:002010-02-02T05:55:25.916-05:00There are a few folks out there who do not experie...There are a few folks out there who do not experience a lot of pain with labor. They are the lucky ones. Many labor nurses and obs will tell you that tall women often have easier labors too. <br /><br /> I find our culture has so many preconceived notions about birth and pain that are just not helpful. I am hoping that will change.pinkyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00198277802918823591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-74268516982336261612010-02-02T05:21:39.621-05:002010-02-02T05:21:39.621-05:00I loved this post.
I actually had someone remove...I loved this post. <br /><br />I actually had someone remove me from their friends list once because I made a post about pain-free/orgasmic birth. I wasn't even saying that *I* had experienced it, just that I was interested and that I believed it was possible. She was SO outraged she utterly flipped out at me and removed me...and we'd been "friends" for two years!<br /><br />I think of that scenario every time I read a post like this and I wonder what it is that has been so deep-seeded into the women of this society to cause such a violent, knee-jerk reaction. I think I know what it is!<br /><br />My husband likes to quote: "Fear is the Mind Killer." That is so true and I believe that FEAR is what causes this reaction from people. Fear that they "did it wrong" fear that they've been lied to their whole lives, fear that they are inadequate, and of course, FEAR is a large part of the cause of the pain we experience anyway!<br /><br />I have read Ingrid Bauer's description of her birth before, but it was a couple of years ago, I think, before I had my son. I had not thought of it since then but reading it now brought back some of my most precious memories. Ethan's birth was only painful to me when I was trying to hold him back in so I could get to my friends house (or more truthfully, the pool I had waiting there, lol). Her words about complete surrender really struck a cord with me because in the moment, that's exactly what it was. I know what she means when she talks about feeling like at any moment it could be TOO overwhelming and even THAT fear creeping in making it edging on towards pain. I LOVED giving birth this last time. I've always said that I enjoyed it but that last one, where more than half of it truly was "painless" I absolutely loved. Best thing I've done to date!<br /><br />And I'm not stupid, lol, SO THERE!Rebekah Costellohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04796386818330396947noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-30771689745316419942010-02-02T02:00:31.177-05:002010-02-02T02:00:31.177-05:00I don't understand those hateful comments. The...I don't understand those hateful comments. They don't compute. Having a pain-free birth means you are stupid? Why? Because you aren't smart enough to listen to everyone around you hollering about how horrible birth is? Shouldn't it be the other way around...if you just buy into whatever anyone tells you without thinking for yourself, wouldn't that make you the dumb one?<br /><br />Jacob's birth was far from pain-free but it is a pain I WANT TO DO AGAIN. I have broken bones, and that's not a pain I want to experience again. And not just beause there's no baby at the end either. ;)Jillhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17475112158639748154noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20642800.post-37526070724578031252010-02-01T21:54:18.579-05:002010-02-01T21:54:18.579-05:00Thanks so much for posting this- especially Ingrid...Thanks so much for posting this- especially Ingrid Bauer's description. It's so nice to hear what the process CAN be like if you surrender to it, rather than try to manage it.Charahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09648120662628364956noreply@blogger.com