Technically, I'm just 40.4 weeks by ovulation/conception dates...but I thought I'd stick with my pattern of using LMP and posting on Tuesdays.
My belly feels like it's going to burst open. There's so much pressure everywhere that I can only walk at a leisurely amble. I set off intending to go at a nice clip, but I literally cannot! I've been having lots of crampy contractions over the past few weeks, definitely stronger than the normal practice contractions you have throughout pregnancy. I think the baby might have turned anterior, because tonight it feels like one smooth back all along my belly, and the movements are much more muted. I should give it a listen with my fetoscope; for me, that's the most accurate way to pin down where the baby is.
It's funny--no, it's NOT funny--how all of our careful plans for the birth of this baby and for my postpartum support have fallen apart. I was supposed to have around 3 straight weeks of help from my mom and then my mother-in-law. And the baby would be a few weeks old by time Eric left on his immersion trip...
Now, we're facing a dramatic upheaval in plans. My mother-in-law flies in from Alberta in less than two days, and still no baby in sight. Eric has lined up replacements for his trip, as it is pretty obvious at this point that he will not be going. Then, after his mom leaves, my mom won't be able to come until late March, leaving me with no postpartum help for a two-week period. Yikes!
I do have a wonderful circle of friends in town who repeatedly remind me that they are here for me, that they will take my children, bring me meals, do whatever it takes to support me during this time. I am so grateful for them. Now my job is to not try to do everything on my own, but to ask for and accept their help.
I never, ever imagined the possibility of still being pregnant and hosting my MIL. Now, don't get me wrong--I really, really like her. But I do not want anyone in my space until after the baby is here and especially when I am in labor! It's nothing against my MIL; I'd feel the same way with my mom and my own sisters. I am really protective of my space until the baby is born. So I am lining up friends who can host my MIL while I am laboring, if the baby doesn't arrive by tomorrow.
Besides these concerns--and of course the normal questions that arise unbidden in my mind: "what's up with this baby? why is it taking so long? at what point should I start to worry?"--I feel a deep sense of peace and calm. Poor Eric, on the other hand, has practically given himself an ulcer. He says he's been wound up so tight the last week or two that he feels like he's going to break. He keeps asking me, "are you sure you don't want to try walking/sex/spicy food/etc to see if it will bring labor on?" Now, I'm all about those things and more, but only for the sheer pleasure of doing them. Not to try to induce labor. If I'm going to take a walk, it's because I want to go outside and enjoy the fresh air. That's it. No ulterior motives. No wearing myself out trying yet another anecdotal method of inducing labor and driving myself crazy in the meantime.
Here's me, slightly disheveled after a brief morning nap (thanks to my friends who watched the kids!):
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| 41 weeks from LMP/40.4 weeks from ovulation |
Wow.. we are like tracking each other perfectly! I was due Monday (as per LMP) Or last Tuesday (early ultrasound).. either way.. I am still here and still pregnant too..
ReplyDeleteWonder who will go first!?
Hang in there and know that someone out there understands.. Hope you're over being sick..
Ash
www.gomumma.blogspot.com
My fourth (out of five) was 8 days "late" and I'm convinced that it was so that I could truly commiserate with other late women!! I've spanned from 38.3 to 41.1, nearly three weeks of variance! Not that I would wish that on anyone...
ReplyDeleteI commend you on your patience! There was *no way* I was going to submit to any medical induction, but I did all sorts of natural induction methods -- none invasive, though. I was aware that, as I was doing them, they might not be actually doing any good (if ANY kind of induction can be good!), but it helped me feel like I was taking a more active role in encouraging my baby to come, and it felt... productive. I lived on Ronnie Falcao's natural induction web page for a week, and tried everything that sounded reasonable. I have no idea if any of the methods I used actually worked, but mentally, it kept me from going crazy.
Hang in there, Rixa! Sending you good thoughts. The best laid plans, huh? :)
ReplyDeleteLook at the bright side: at least you don't have an OB trying to push you into an induction because you are "past due."
ReplyDeletePast due babies were on my mind today (my last one was 2 1/2 weeks "late", and my current one is due in another month, so I am naturally wondering about the many possibilities) and I came across this article, which I thought was nice:
http://www.glorialemay.com/blog/?p=107
Since you already have more than one kiddo, I just have to tell you that it is WAY easier to do the whole Post-Partum period without constant company/help than the same with only two (an eldest child and a new baby). Seriously SO much easier. I've never had really any "constant" help. My Jessie had to leave me in the hospital to sleep at home (and process the whole experience, I think) so that he could go to school the day after we had #1. Thankfully she was born at around noon, so that was possible cause he was really stressed about missing school... Culinary School... the days are like weeks worth of info!
ReplyDeleteAfter #2, he had to go to work the next day. After #3, he got to stay home with me the day we delivered (cause I had the baby at around midnight and we didn't get to bed until 3am) and of course he was home for the labor, but he was off to work the next day (a Monday). The only reason I'm telling you all this is cause I'm totally NOT a wonder-woman type. I'm seriously fallable and imperfect in tremendous ways. I've learned to let go of things and give myself some (lots of!) grace when my babies are brand new.
This time I have MORE people telling me they want to help me than I've EVER had before and I feel sorta overwhelmed by the prospect of help.... Funny, right? Anyway... you can TOTALLY do whatever comes your way. I'm SURE of it.
Also... and just cause it's DEFINITELY The story of MY babies' births: "woman plans, God laughs," is WAY too true, don't you think? ;) heeheehee
My daughter was born at 41 weeks 1 day so I feel you on the discomforts of being SO pregnant! On the other hand, I felt from the get-go that she wouldn't come until after her due date, so I didn't start getting antsy until just after 40 weeks.
ReplyDeleteI hope for your sake this baby comes soon!
Yeah I don't suggest over doing it on the walks and such. Thats what made me have all the false labor that tired my uterus out! The day before Elizabeth Iris was born I spent all day at the Tanners Orchard and then Apple Blosson Farm. Walked from here to the moon trying to induce, and she came the next morning in a hurry I remember talking to you on the phone after having contractions for only half an hour and they were 1 and 2 mins apart! Labor was 2 hours long with a 7 min delivery from water break to baby in my arms! Crazy time, needless to say My U was too pooped to stop the bleeding and I had to have manual extraction 3!!!! times! Not fun by the way, with no drugs and AFTER I had my tears fixed.
ReplyDeleteSo I would tell you to trust your body. If you don't feel paniced, don't get paniced. Oh, also get a Priesthood Blessing from Eric!! What a good, caring, nervous father he is! I'll go on his trip for him, noproblemo! ;)
As for the mothers, if my mother came to my house at any time I'd throw her out, let alone in labor. eech, I shudder at the thought! LOL. Have her go to the Temple while you are in labor tha would keep her busy and get some service done at the same time. But if you need any help I can hop in my new truk and be there in a flash! Rest easy its gatta end soon!
Good ole Third Baby Syndrome! Proof positive that you cannot rely on previous births to dictate how this one will go. :)
ReplyDeleteI feel with you. My second baby came 3 days after her due date, but looked like she was actually 2 weeks late. Which is how I had been feeling all this time waiting. It's hard at the end, but you are doing great! You look beautiful, and I like your hair, looks so nice longer now. Hang in there and good luck!
ReplyDeleteHang in there! I went to 41w5d (and then went into labor naturally), and my parents were in town because they6'd bought plane tickets months beforehand and thought the baby would be there by then . . . yeah.
ReplyDeleteI amused myself by gleefully answering "Oh, last week," anytime someone asked me when I was due.
Good luck!
Good luck, Rixa. I wish I could say more, but the previous commenters seem to have said it all already.
ReplyDeleteHow's your bathroom coming along? ;-)
ReplyDeleteMy fingers are crossed that the baby decides to come before your MIL!
ReplyDeleteLooking great! Enjoy the last few moments of your pregnancy :)
ReplyDeleteI don't think I could handle anyone else there during labor, either. Definitely not my MIL. When you've had a quiet, peaceful labor experience with minimal other people involvement...it's really hard to imagine messing up that moment with the presence of other people.
Rixa, our tummies were twins (well until about a day before I had the baby and then he DROPPED big time the morning I went into labor)! You look incredible.
ReplyDeleteAnd I disagree about eating spicy food, having tons of sex, and walking to induce labor. I mean, why say no to such great things?!?! I ate spicy thai sandwiches and indian food on Saturday, took walks as much as possible, and took full advantage of getting to have sex with my husband while I could. As one of my friends commented, an orgasm sounds much better than castor oil. Why turn down such a good thing?
I'm hoping your labor starts really soon!
Ahhh...I feel for you, girl!
ReplyDeleteI went to 41 weeks with my first, and just about drove myself crazy. It seems like you are handling it much, much better despite all of the craziness involved. I would be freaking out about my MIL being there!
Sending peace and blessings your way as everything falls into place.
Love,
Caroline
Sending you hugs!
ReplyDeleteIs it so very wrong of me to be glad to know you are past your due date, as was I.
ReplyDeleteI know so very mean. But going longer than expected brings its own set of challenges, no matter how zen you plan to be about it all.
Its hard to understand unless you have been there yourself.
I swore each pregnancy that I would not care one bit about "when" the baby would come but its hard to make any arrangements about who will be there, who will not and buy plane tickets or plan travel accordingly. Its so very hard.
I don't agree with all the planned inductions these days but a small part of me does understand. Especially for women who have no support from external forces (their husband, their doctor, their friends) to let nature take its course. And they are uncomfortable and their husband is on pins and needles and the doctor offers a date... like I said I don't agree but I understand.
Oh man, I am so with you on this one! I have nothing against my ILs but they are arriving NINE DAYS before my due date! I have been trying so hard not to think and/or stress about having my space invaded at that most delicate of times, but it's not working all that well. I'm so with you on being protective of your space. And of course, this will mean that my baby is not going to come until my due date or even one or two days after!
ReplyDeleteI just want to reach out and hug you - because I so get it.
PS - my word verification is bringme - as in bring me my baby already! :-)
Hang in there! *hugs*
My ChARLIE was almost 42 weeks, and ended up being 12 pounds even. I know about cant walk. Its the worst. Hang in there kiddo! xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteI know you've had her now :) But I've got to say again...if anyone could deal with life post-baby without extra help, it would be you. If I were you, my husband would have gone on his trip, he'd figure that I'd (you) done UC already and this time I/you have a midwife on board, and you like to labour alone...
ReplyDeleteOff to read your birth story!